The Editor's Eye

The way people write says a lot about them. Some writers are minimalists; they use no more words than necessary to get their point across. Others use lots of adjectives, adverbs and intensifiers to express themselves. I’m of the opinion that our writing style is a reflection who we are as individuals, but the bottom line for all of us is this: clear, concise writing is more impactful and easier to read than wordy, redundant fluff.

I’ll never forget the first time I had an article picked up by a newspaper. When the editor told me how much she liked it, I was thrilled! Then she asked if I could edit it from 1200 words to 500 and my excitement turned to indignation. How dare she ask me to cut precious words out of my perfect story? When I politely suggested that she might want to loosen her word count restrictions to accommodate my brilliant piece, she gave me a patient chuckle and some of the best writing advice I’ve ever heard. “Don’t worry, Elizabeth, you’re the only one who will know what’s not there.”

In retrospect, editing that article was one of the best writing lessons I’ve had in my career; a Zen writing experience if there ever was one. Now, I’m not suggesting that you need to go to such extremes to improve your writing, but using an “editor’s eye” is rarely a bad thing. Take the following sentence for example:

It can really be very annoying when writers use way too many more words than absolutely necessary to get their basic message across to their readers.

If that sentence reads like something you could have written, you might want to consider simplifying your message. Imagine a whole document of sentences like that. After a while, the reader’s eyes start to glaze over and they miss the key points of the document because there are too many unnecessary words piled on top of each other. How about something like this instead?

It can be annoying when writers use more words than necessary to get their message across.

Clearer, simpler, easier to read, right? I’m not saying that you should avoid using modifiers and intensifiers altogether, just reminding you to be careful with them. They are like the words that "cried wolf." Using them strategically throughout your document can help you highlight important points and add emphasis, guiding your reader’s attention to the truly important stuff. But overusing them bogs your readers down and makes them wonder why they are reading in the first place. And that’s a bad thing.

Try this on your next important project: pretend that you have to cut out one-third of the words. (The word count is in the lower, left-hand corner of your Word document.) Go through the piece and omit any extraneous intensifiers, adverbs, redundancies, slang – anything that doesn’t need to be there. I’ll bet you find a lot of extra words covering up your core message. (Hint: The ones I see most often are very, really, so, absolutely and totally; so keep yourself on high alert for these.) And don’t worry, when you’re done, you’ll be the only one who will know what’s not there.

Here’s another exercise for you. In the name of, “we teach what we need to learn,” I skipped the editing phase of this composition completely. As I look over this post, I’m finding many words and phrases that I would normally delete. How many can you find?

Write on and on and on! ;o)

I I Me Me My

Quick – which is correct?

She made the cookies for Simon and me. Or,
She made the cookies for Simon and I.

This is one of the most common problems I see in writing (and hear in speech). I think it's because when we were young, most of us had it drilled into our heads that instead of saying things like, “Me and Simon want cookies.” We should say, “Simon and I want cookies.” And that is correct. But many of us took that rule too far and assumed that we should always use the pronoun I when speaking or writing about ourselves in a group. But this is an incorrect assumption.

So in the above example, which sentence is correct? The answer is: the first one. Why? Because I is the subject form of the pronoun, yet in the second sentence it is being used as an object. Now, don’t freak out, you use subject and object pronouns correctly without even knowing it most of the time. For example, you might say, “I want a cookie.” But you wouldn’t say, “Me want a cookie.” And you know that it would be incorrect to say, “Give the cookie to I.” So why would you say, “Give the cookie to Simon and I”? You wouldn’t.

Subject pronouns (I, you, he, she, it, we, they) are subject pronouns because they do something.

I want chocolate chip cookies. (I is the subject, because it is doing the wanting.)

You remembered that peanut butter chocolate chip is my favorite! (You is the subject, because it is doing the remembering.)

Object pronouns (me, you, him, her, it, us, you, them) are object pronouns because something is being done to them.

Simon gave the cookie to me. (Me is the object because it is receiving the action.)

She made chocolate chip cookies for him. (Him is the object because it is receiving the action.)

You can also check to see if you are using the correct pronoun, by inserting the objects one at a time.

Please give all the cookies to [Simon and] me.

I will be sad if you take the cookies away from [Simon and] me.

Here are a few more examples, for good measure.

Incorrect: Him and me are going to eat all the cookies.
Correct: He and I are going to eat all the cookies.

Incorrect: I made cookies for you and they.
Correct: I made cookies for you and them.

And one more hint: if the pronoun comes after a preposition (to, for, of, with, etc.) it usually takes the object form. (As in, the object of the preposition.)

Can it really be that simple? Of course not. There are many other pronoun forms that I haven't even mentioned here (reflexive, possessive, relative, etc.). My hope is that you will be encouraged to send me a note with your questions, concerns or confusions so that we can work on them together.

By the way, I put that in about the peanut butter chocolate chip just in case you're planning on doing some baking anytime soon...

Write on!

To Err is Forbidden

The other day, while sending a message promoting my new Page on Facebook, one of my worst professional nightmares came true. In the millisecond between hitting the “Send” button and seeing the happy, “Message Sent!” window, I caught a glimpse of an egregious typo. I was mortified.

Now, I know that most of the people I sent the message to probably didn’t even notice. And those who did notice probably assumed that I was just in a hurry and typing quickly (both true), but it’s a tough pill for me to swallow nonetheless. I suppose the thing that bothers me the most about this error, is that I wasn’t practicing what I preach. I always tell my clients and audiences that when composing a message online, they should write the message in Word (or another app that has a spelling checker), then cut and paste it into the online document. But I didn’t do that. I was in a hurry and just shot it off without thinking. Shame on me.

I realize that as a writer I am held to a higher standard than most when it comes to such things. And this is as it should be, because I put myself out there as an expert. After all, you wouldn’t continue to see a chiropractor who constantly complained of aches and pains or a tax preparer who was routinely audited, would you? Of course not. So when I make an obvious error like the one I made on Facebook, I tend to beat myself up over it.

But in the light of a new day, I can honestly say that I’m glad that it happened. OK, maybe glad is a strong word, but every once in a while I need a swift kick to remind me to slow down and take my own advice. And you can learn from my mistake, too. Remember to follow these steps when writing anything:
Plan
Write
Read
Check
(And if possible, share.)

And now, this week's grammar lesson:

Plural Possessives (Aw, c'mon! It'll be fun!)

Making a noun possessive is easy. You add an apostrophe 's, right? Well, almost. You have to consider the form of the word before the apostrophe, because it shows how many owners there are.

If the word is a singular noun (one owner), always add 's, regardless of its ending.

Elizabeth's typo
The dress's hem
The ox's hoof

If the word is plural and ends in s, just add the apostrophe.

Both kids' cookies
The dresses' hems
The boss' office

If the word is plural and doesn’t end in s, add 's.

The children's cookies
Men's shoes
The oxen's hooves

But make sure you have formed the plural correctly before adding the possessive. Most of the confusion in this area comes from proper names, so here are the rules for that: Usually, you will form the plural of a name simply by adding s.

There were two Claires in the room.
Both of the Roberts are tall.

But, if the name ends in s, sh, ch, z or x, add es.

The Gomezes are coming to dinner. (More than one Gomez)
The Marxes ate all the cookies. (More than one Marx)

Now that you have formed the correct plural, (Gomezes, Marxes) you can add the possessive by following the rules above.

The Marxes' cookies (The cookies belong to more than one Marx.)
The Gomezes' children (The children belong to more than one Gomez.)

Simple, right? If not, send me your specific examples (Thanks, C.P.) and I’ll try to help you out.
And thanks for sending in your questions and comments. They really helped me to know what kinds of grammar issues you struggle with. I find them very inspiring.

Write on!

Capital Punishment

Today, I’m going to introduce you to a very good friend of mine. Readers, this is Shift Key. Shift Key, these are my readers. You might remember each other from many years ago back in school, but I’m really hoping you can become reacquainted. Because, readers, you want Shift Key to be your friend. Really you do, because if Shift Key is not your friend, he will tell the world many ugly things about you. For example, he will let the world know that you don’t think enough about yourself to capitalize the pronoun, “I.” And then – oh, how people will talk!

Seriously, we all know what the shift key does, but I’ve noticed that many people are reluctant to use it because they aren’t sure what, exactly, to capitalize. So here they are, the basic rules of capitalization. Read them. Learn them. Memorize them. Share them. Ready?

1. The first letter of a sentence is always a capital letter. Always. No exceptions. This includes a quoted sentence within a sentence.

The woman said, “You should share your cookies with me.”

2. The pronoun I is always capitalized. Always. No exceptions. I mean it. Don’t mess with me on this one.

3. Proper nouns are always capitalized, including the names of countries, organizations, languages, buildings, deities, athletic groups, courses and nationalities. (Hint: If it's a name -capitalize it.)

English
Starbucks
Disneyland
Scotland
Microsoft

Algebra II
Green Bay Packers
Wood’s Humane Society

The Virgin Mary

4. Capitalize the days of the week and months of the year, but not the seasons unless they are used in a title.

Friday
October
My favorite season is autumn.
The 2008 Summer Olympics

5. A person’s title is capitalized when it precedes a name.

Queen Elizabeth
President Obama

Or, when it follows a name on a signature line.

Sincerely,

Elizabeth McGregor, Cookie Monster

Or, if you are using it to directly address someone.

Are cookies bad for me, Doctor?

But not when it is used to describe someone.

Elizabeth is a cookie monster.

6. Directions that are part of a name or region are capitalized.

They moved to the Northeast.
She is from Southern California.

Compass directions are not.

Turn east on Marsh Street.

7. Capitalize abbreviations and words derived from specific names.

USA
Freudian slip
Napoleonic

Unless they are commonly used in a general sense.

french fries
pasteurized milk

8. In the title of a publication or printed work, capitalize all words except articles or short prepositions, (a, an, in, the) and always capitalize the first and last word, regardless of length and part of speech.

A Whack on the Side of the Head
The Old Man and the Sea

To Kill a Mockingbird

Now that I’ve overwhelmed you with all of these rules, I’ll drop the other shoe. While it has been my experience that most people avoid the use of the shift key, there are some who feel the need to Capitalize almost Every Word. I have a dear friend who capitalizes pronouns as though they were proper nouns, bless his heart. He’ll write things like, “Do You ever hear from Her?” In his case it’s endearing, but incorrect nonetheless.

Capitalization is notoriously one of those language issues that causes scholars and grammarians to fight like little schoolchildren. The Chicago Manual of Style dedicates about 15 pages to the subject of capitalization and all of its rules and exceptions to rules. Like most things in our language, there are clear rules of usage, and rules that are open to interpretation. The above list is not intended to be the last word in rules for upper-case usage, but a basic guide to assist you in determining when to use your new friend, Shift Key. If you have any question and you can’t seem to find your copy of The Chicago Manual of Style, give me shout; I’ll be happy to help.

Write on!