I I Me Me My

Quick – which is correct?

She made the cookies for Simon and me. Or,
She made the cookies for Simon and I.

This is one of the most common problems I see in writing (and hear in speech). I think it's because when we were young, most of us had it drilled into our heads that instead of saying things like, “Me and Simon want cookies.” We should say, “Simon and I want cookies.” And that is correct. But many of us took that rule too far and assumed that we should always use the pronoun I when speaking or writing about ourselves in a group. But this is an incorrect assumption.

So in the above example, which sentence is correct? The answer is: the first one. Why? Because I is the subject form of the pronoun, yet in the second sentence it is being used as an object. Now, don’t freak out, you use subject and object pronouns correctly without even knowing it most of the time. For example, you might say, “I want a cookie.” But you wouldn’t say, “Me want a cookie.” And you know that it would be incorrect to say, “Give the cookie to I.” So why would you say, “Give the cookie to Simon and I”? You wouldn’t.

Subject pronouns (I, you, he, she, it, we, they) are subject pronouns because they do something.

I want chocolate chip cookies. (I is the subject, because it is doing the wanting.)

You remembered that peanut butter chocolate chip is my favorite! (You is the subject, because it is doing the remembering.)

Object pronouns (me, you, him, her, it, us, you, them) are object pronouns because something is being done to them.

Simon gave the cookie to me. (Me is the object because it is receiving the action.)

She made chocolate chip cookies for him. (Him is the object because it is receiving the action.)

You can also check to see if you are using the correct pronoun, by inserting the objects one at a time.

Please give all the cookies to [Simon and] me.

I will be sad if you take the cookies away from [Simon and] me.

Here are a few more examples, for good measure.

Incorrect: Him and me are going to eat all the cookies.
Correct: He and I are going to eat all the cookies.

Incorrect: I made cookies for you and they.
Correct: I made cookies for you and them.

And one more hint: if the pronoun comes after a preposition (to, for, of, with, etc.) it usually takes the object form. (As in, the object of the preposition.)

Can it really be that simple? Of course not. There are many other pronoun forms that I haven't even mentioned here (reflexive, possessive, relative, etc.). My hope is that you will be encouraged to send me a note with your questions, concerns or confusions so that we can work on them together.

By the way, I put that in about the peanut butter chocolate chip just in case you're planning on doing some baking anytime soon...

Write on!